Category: Relationships (Page 8 of 11)

This includes posts about romantic relationships, family, friends.

Reintegration After Vacation

I have been back in this time zone (EST) for three days but I don’t feel a part of this rhythm yet. I have been home, which after travelling for any length of time, is a tremendous comfort to me (and most people) but I have not changed gears; I have not gone into productive behaviour and I certainly haven’t returned to my reality (yet).

I decided to extend this feeling of holiday and allow myself time to reintegrate.

At the Louvre

We’re in front of the Louvre

It’s a need I feel has become quite palpable for me over the years. I’m sure this is something that is true for many people, and there’s no need to be highly sensitive or an introvert to recognize a need to transition. For the worker bees, we feel it on Monday mornings. Others find the first few days after a holiday to be a drag; they feel tired and they can’t concentrate. Their minds wander to other places and their personal rhythm seems outside of their “normal” routine and duties.

I am blessed with wanderlust and like many of us, I was not born into a family of unlimited means and so, I have to prepare my travels. In a way, this is a blessing because it’s made me deeply curious and grateful to experience new places, cultures, foods, customs and people.

We're at the Arc de Triomphe in Paris

We’re at the Arc de Triomphe in Paris

A holiday is not necessarily synonymous with vacation (or travel), but for me, it is often a choice I make for wellness. I find travelling to be soul food. I usually find myself refreshed; my spirits lifted, my heart full and my mind clear. My body is usually spent and I sleep soundly and I dream the most vivid dreams.

When I travel, whether for business or pleasure (but mostly for fun!), I feel like a sponge or a satellite dish (you can relate to one of these, I’m sure); I want to grasp as much as my being can handle.  It’s my way of travelling and it makes me feel alive. I remember to pace myself, as often, my body will remind me of its needs. I take those reminders as cues to savour what I’ve experienced.

As an eloquent friend met in Paris put it:

“You can travel to tick items off your list while exhausting yourself or you can travel to get a sense of place and people while savouring the experience.”

I couldn’t agree more. I often fight the urge to be “productive” but it doesn’t take long for me to recognize how happy I am going with the flow, making choices and cherishing this moment. Travelling brings out the best and worst of me. In the end, it shows me my humanity and my greatness and I am grateful.

This July, I have seen marvellous places and tasted delicious dishes. I’ve heard foreign

Julia and Will, showered with confetti on their wedding day.

Julia and Will, showered with confetti on their wedding day.

languages tickle my ear. I have felt kindness, pride and generosity from strangers and friends alike. I have been welcomed with open arms and blessed with the hospitality of many. I have imagined many lives and paths. I bore witness to a dear friend’s day of love and commitment (congratulations to Julia and Will on their wedding! Can’t wait to see you at home in August). I have shared every day with my life partner and I can say that I am happy and I recognize how fortunate I am to be walking my path with a wonderful soul and my best friend.

It’s so overwhelming to be back… I just need a few more days. A few more days to integrate this experience. Growing takes adjustment. A few more days to then plug myself back into my life here. But how? I fully expect to be adding to it some of the lessons, stories and feelings from my latest excursion. But for now, I just need a few more days of just being. Have you ever felt such beauty, such effervescence and deep peace that you want to hold onto it and then you realize that your life “format” is (was) just too small to allow you to function with all this wonder?

That’s it… my previous life format was just too small. Travel is an expansive endeavour.  This outcome is also why I thirst for travel.

“The mind, once stretched by a new idea, never returns to its original dimensions.”

Ralph Waldo Emerson

Scott and Mercedes smiling at the Queen's pub in London, England

We’re having a great time with friends in London at the Queen’s pub.

I plan to share some of my European adventure with you over the next couple of weeks as these past couple of weeks have taught me about mySelf in its grace and in its humanity. I have tried to post to instagram some snapshots of the beautiful places I have been; I hope you’ve caught a glimpse!

How do you transition to a day-to-day routine after a holiday or a vacation?

Eurotrip: Leaving on a Jetplane…

The proud Canadian in me is a little disappointed to be missing the festivities and of course, the fireworks, but the part of me that is consumed by wanderlust is quite excited to be heading on my first across-the-pond vacation since 2009. (Yikes! I know…)

Scott and I are heading to the Old Continent for a few weeks; it’s time for a EUROTRIP! We’re attending a dear friend’s wedding in Paris (she’s more like a sister, so it’s a must) via Brussels. Those who love travelling as much as I do are probably sharing my #sorrynotsorry thoughts about missing the National Holiday. Hello, smoother security measures and boarding procedures? Also, it’s a bonus travel day!

Scott hugs Mercedes in New Brunswick (2013)

Scott is humouring me so we get nice travel pics.

Roll With the Punches

As some of you may know, we were in “financial freedom mode” (i.e. paying off loans) so when we heard the news, we had an honest (albeit short) discussion about our priorities; there was no way we were missing the wedding. Sometimes, in life, events come up for us to re-evaluate our priorities. Yes, we were repaying loans and we’ll get back to that mode of “freedom focus” when we return. But we had to ask ourselves why we were even so focused on freedom in the first place. There were many reasons, but a big one for me (as well as for Scott), is to enjoy life and ride the wave of opportunity before it crashes into us. Scott often says he ‘only wants to be happy when he grows up’. It used to be charming, then it annoyed me and now, I see how broad this statement is. I choose to adopt it because it means I follow my heart and I plan, as best I can, for the unexpected. When planning fails, I roll with the punches.

We had to ask ourselves: “what are we doing all this for if we can’t even part-take in our friends’ milestones?”

Scott at Peggy's Cove, Nova Scotia

Guess where Scott is? (2013) Hint: It’s in Nova Scotia

A plane ticket isn’t any cheaper if you return sooner, so we decided to make it a holiday. Our first international trip together. It’ll be a golden opportunity to reconnect to each other, to re-discover each other as we discover new (old) parts of the world together and it’ll be a great spiritual practice for us both. It’ll be a time for sharing bits of ourselves that routine tends to put to sleep.

When we’d worked out that we were going, we had to figure out the logistics. We’re pretty proud to say that despite the short notice, this trip is not a debt but planned spending. Rock on, us!

Harmonizing Different Travelling Views

Scott and Mercedes at the Anne of Green Gables House in PEI (2011)

Scott and I at the Anne of Green Gables House in PEI (2011)

My partner and I view travelling a bit differently; he feels it’s a welcome luxury and I feel it’s an essential to balanced adult life. But we’re united in the value of family and friendship that we’re honouring. For me, it’s a much anticipated return to Europe (my last hop was in 2009) but the world changes and it’ll be an altogether new trip to do this trek with my partner. I can’t wait to share my wanderlust with this beautiful person. I want to tell him: “See? THIS is why I want to see the world with you. There’s such wonder. There’s such beauty and I want to share it with you. I want to be a witness to your life. I want you to share my adventures. The world’s a big buffet and although I can’t it like this every day, I want to enjoy every yummy piece of this world.”

Counsellors and therapists always encourage couples to “make quality time for each other” and “try new things together”, which I feel this trip fulfills. They also say that renovations and travel are big tests. I see tests as a rather formalized way of saying you’re practising your life. Yoga is a practice but so are your relationships of any nature. Every day is new and each person evolves so relationships are a dance. I prefer to make mine a connected but fun dance. Missteps will likely happen, as they do in everyday life, but what’s the fun in a perfectly rehearsed waltz? Some days, we’ll be like a tango or a westie dance, but many days are like swing for us; it’s partnership, it’s fun and it’s all about doing it together.

I can’t wait to go adventuring in Belgium, France and Holland. We’ll also be taking scenic and sentimental detours to smell

Mercedes is standing in a garden in King's Landing, NB (2013)

I’m standing in a garden in King’s Landing, NB (2013)

the roses (or the Thames or the Alps, no biggie). Travelling reminds me of my passions, or my love for humankind, or my thirst for learning. It makes me feel alive. For a few weeks, I forget about the humdrum of jobs, responsibilities and other people’s timelines. I remember who I am and I see with my heart. I’m also looking forward to seeing my partner in this light. Let this trip be about love.

While we’re out adventuring, I’ve got a few fun posts for you… and if you’re lucky, I might even post a few short on-the-go updates.  😉

What situations have caused you to re-evaluate your priorities? What choices have you made for your wellness and enjoyment? How does travelling add to your life?

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