Tag: Abundance (Page 3 of 3)

How Choices Make You Happier

I’ve learned a really difficult lesson this year. Among many tough realizations, I’ve learned that choices are healthy.

Having many options to choose from, reviewing them, making a commitment to a choice and sticking to it. It’s all part of a very intentional process. It’s a process that fosters awareness and cultivates mindfulness.

I’m someone who likes to learn a LOT, do a LOT, be everywhere, travel to new places, master skills right away… and of course, this isn’t possible simultaneously. Most people need to work at refining their skills, as do I. Most people learn over time and practice. I’m no exception. I often wish I could just *know* something already.

Can’t I just, hold this guide book against my forehead and absorb it?

We can travel many places, but not all at once. We can only be in one place at a time. I think that this “buffer” between our minds and our immediate realities is healthy. It often protects us from wasting time and energy doing things we’d truly regret or it helps us avoid doing something that would keep us from doing something we’d love more. I suppose, this could also be linked to “manifesting”. This teaches me patience and not to “rush” life, because here and now is what I’ve got..

Probably that one of the best examples where I have difficulty choosing in my life is in my relationship with books. I love them! I want to read them all! I want to know the stories of the world! I am easily distracted when it comes to which books to read, because each book is a story that is fascinating and full of adventure, hope and opportunity. I have a reading problem… I read many, many books at once. Although, in itself, this isn’t a problem, what is an issue is that if I start a novel or a non-fiction book, I need to make it to the end. I need to consciously choose to make that my “main” read at one time. Otherwise, I’ll never finish it.

yogagirl_US-coverMy friends have this running joke that I’ll never finish reading Le Parfum, by Patrick Suskind. It’s true! At this point, I’ve given up. I just don’t like it enough. I’m choosing to commit to other books that are either more my idea of “light reading” or more my idea of “inspirational reading”. Right now, I’m reading Yoga Girl by Rachel Brathen (non-fiction) and I’m finishing up the first book in the Beautiful Creatures (fiction) series. I know… Everyone needs variety!

Money, money, money…

This year, I’ve also learned how to properly budget, despite being close to 30. I guess you could call me a financial late bloomer. How did I ever get by without using this basic skill? Apparently, I’m not the only woman, or the only Gen Y for that matter.

Money is a great servant but a terrible master.

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You Need A Budget – Great App!

Learning how to manage my own money has been a step in self-care, acceptance and love. I am worthy of a stress-free financial life. For me, this meant re-evaluating my needs, my lifestyle preferences and my medium and long-term goals. For me, it meant making a new habit and loving what it did for me. I guess you could call it my little financial fitness awakening.

We’ve all heard “You can’t have it all”. Actually… real life for go-getters goes more like this:

“You can’t have it all at once, but you can have most of what you want, *if* you think differently about how that looks for you.”

Then what do we want most and how do we enjoy it?

Knowing I can’t possibly be everywhere, do everything, know everything, own everything…it releases the pressure of expectations I set for myself. Without pressure, there’s freedom. With freedom, there’s responsibility. My responsibility is to myself to build a life that reflects who I am and what I love. For me, it means buying less to do more, scheduling less to leave room for spontaneity and tea with friends.

Our choices lead us to experiences that cost us time, energy and limit us to a space in time. No one knows how long they’ve really got on Earth. Some of our choices also cost us in dollars. This seemingly adds another layer to our decision-making. In truth, no matter the factors to consider, the steps should lead back to us, to our centre. Don’t we want our lives to be our works of art? Don’t we want our lives to be a reflection of who truly are inside? In essence, the process enhances mindfulness.

What matters to me right now? Does this decision respect my core values?

Someone who can make choices with which he or she is at peace is leads his or her life artfully, from their heart-centre. Commitment easily follows choices that honour our personal truths. Having to make choices helps me refocus as I come back to my values, priorities and goals.

When we chose consciously, we better appreciate what we have and ultimately, we know ourselves better.

When Abundance Comes Knocking

Today, I was sitting in on a budgeting seminar and had a very exciting thought occur (no I haven’t finally lost my mind in order to love budgets). I realized that once I’d started letting go of some fears around money and started looking at my situation from a realistic, but heart-centered place, abundance had also started knocking on my door. Was I a better host?

So if I take a few steps back to explain what I was doing on a budgeting seminar, you’ll follow my process.

I’ve been carrying student debt since I’ve graduated from university (almost a decade ago). I thought I would have “so many years ahead of me” to get rid of this and that my bright future and promising career was going to provide me with enough of an income that thoughts of a cushion or a budget didn’t even properly occur to me. Then I was affected by the recession a few times. What? Me? Yes, me. My promising job laid me off as soon as I graduated. I thought that wouldn’t…couldn’t happen to me. Then in 2010 I was let go without cause. My thoughts then: “Universe, are you freakin’ kidding me?!?” I then accumulated some consumer debt.

Sure, I could get into why I think this happened to me (i.e. habits, beliefs, lack of experience), or rationalize it, or posit how I could have handled this differently but the point of this post is rather to state where I am now. I’ve carried debt. What a big taboo! It’s sad, because it can be avoided (and definitely corrected) but we shouldn’t be embarrassed to admit we do not know how to handle money if our society doesn’t encourage this type of education. It’s left to our parents, and often, our adult selves. I’m actually quite surprised how few men and women know how to budget, use credit cards and plan for their financial freedom.

In my life, it’s a reality I’ve had a hard time accepting. I’ve had to look at myself honestly. I’ve had to observe my behaviour without judgment. I’ve had to evaluate my priorities and make choices. I had to be honest with my partner. Most difficult of all, I had to admit my weaknesses and ask for help.

Ouch.

So…I created space for abundance to come in.

One of the solutions offered to me was to start getting familiar with some no-nonsense money and budgeting experts. Another solution offered was to do some belief work. I think I needed both, as I’m sure a lot of us do. I’ve been working on both solutions. You need to get the point of an exercise and where you’re starting from, before you can learn the technique. That’s how I understand it.

The first step with money, as with anything, is assessing where you are, and that’s where a budget (and tracking) becomes useful. And that’s where you came in on this post.

So here I was sitting on this budgeting workshop with YNAB, and as I’m plowing away at my own budget, they announce a winner of the software: Mercedes – That’s me!!! WHOA!!! That’s awesome.

As I thanked the organizers for the prize, it hit me: I won two prizes from draws in the space of one month. TWO PRIZES! I hadn’t won anything in contests or draws in YEARS. The other prize I won was a consultation with a coach. One could say my “luck” turned around. A wiser person would say my mindset changed.

What I took away from this was that not only was the Universe giving me exactly what I needed, I had effectively opened the door to variable forms of abundance by proactively asking for help. I’d opened the door to solutions coming in different forms; not just the ones I liked or expected. I had accepted my current situation as my starting point, instead of regretting, throwing a pity party or “should-ing” myself until I felt ill. None of these emotions or mindsets would help me anyway. I was ready, in this state of acceptance and humility, to take constructive action and receive abundance. I’m cleaning house for better guests, because I want to be a better host. I’ve received the form of abundance I needed, because I welcomed it when it knocked, albeit quietly, on my door.

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